So from a standing start I had spent a good 10 minutes looking at all my options and literally found this company based on Google alone. Must be a pretty cheap conversion and they didn’t even have to waste any other money on me to try and convince me to try their salon.

I then called them to make an appointment – the phone rang and rang and there wasn’t even an answer phone to take a message. I tried them again later that day and it just rang and rang. I tried a couple of times and eventually ran out of patience and just went with the number 2 option on my list.

Just goes to show, you can have all the best search and review mechanisms in place, but if your staff can’t perform the simple task of manning the phones and taking calls, who knows what additional sales will pass you by.

With the theme for the year just past being the Olympics, there was a strong focus on all fronts to give the nod to the games. London based agency, Precedent turned their hand for all the branding and online communications while a select group of creatives were tasked with spoofing the 12 Official London Olympics 2012 posters which were unveiled early November 2012. The side project for Podge was supported by The Drum who set out to see if digital agencies really understood graphic design.

With all that said, yours truly had the opportunity to put together one of the spoof posters. The poster I was given was that of Sarah Morris, an artist best known for her abstract paintings based on cityscapes and architecture. Sarah’s Paralympic tribute poster was an abstract representation of one of London’s most famous landmarks, Big Ben. My take was the based around the London streets during 2012 and the controversy surrounding the Olympic Lanes we’ll all learn to love. Here’s what I had to say about it.

Sarah Morris depicted an abstract Big Ben during 2012 in her poster, here’s my take on the London streets during 2012. It won’t be fun. The olympic Lanes have caused quite the stir in the lead up to London 2012, while we are unlikely to get the same treatment for Podge 2012, at least we know that will be fun.

After the Christmas haze has subsided and the fuzzy red wine flog cleared it’s easy to see how Podge has helped us here at Cubo connect with potential partners, learn some key industry and forge some great partnerships. We’ll be there in 2012, posters or not.

If you’d like to see the full set of Spoof Olympics posters you can find them over on The Drum website. http://bit.ly/rUz8DX

Us marketeers often look at their campaigns with admiration as their down to earth approach always seem to hit the mark.  And their latest experiential campaign is another gem…

innocent’s HGV ‘Hungry Grassy Van’ which will be serving up tasty treats across the country and competition entrants will be in with a chance to win a visit from the HGV at an event of their choice.  And what’s particularly lovely it is that everything they serve up will be completely free.

As ‘Jamie Oliver’ and worthy as it all sounds I can’t help but wonder if the British public really care about their 5 a day.  I mean, I know we all care to an extent, as we all make a concerted effort once in a while, but we tend to lapse the moment temptation comes our way.  If your office is anything like ours there’s endless amounts of chocolate, cakes and biscuits brought in every time someone goes on holiday, and then there’s the birthday treats…  somehow a bowl of apples or crudités doesn’t quite cut it, does it?  And as obesity figures in the UK are predicted to soar it’s hard to know just what it will take before we choose fruit and veg over other types of snacks.

Anyway, wonderings aside… this is another step in the right direction to encourage healthy eating from innocent.  All we need now is a hot day in September and a reason for a get together!

There are a host of prestigious parties organised, with Virgin Holidays being one of the more spectacular, with guests encouraged to get involved in the theme for the year. This year’s theme was ‘Olympics – London to Rio’, therefore the team came together to forge ‘Team SEA’ the ultimate boxing combination, including the following competing ‘weights’:

Super Heavy Weight – Dave Ody

Lightweight – Simon Parry

Paperweight – Ruth Roseweir

Featherweight – Lucy Quilliam

Unfortunately the team missed out on the ‘best costume’ award, however they were praised for braving the cold in shorts.

A. A nervous wreck…..

Ruth has a fear of water… and breathing under it, so when she found herself submerged in a tropical reef surrounded by 2,000 fish, rays and even sharks at Discovery Cove’s SeaVenture attraction, let’s just say she was rather ‘sea-shell’ shocked.

Ruth was hosting eight travel agents on a recent familiarisation trip to SeaWorld Parks in Florida as part of our ongoing trade marketing activity to showcase the latest park attractions.

As the group prepared to experience the park’s newest diving attraction, there were reservations from various people, including Ruth, as to whether they could dive with ‘respiratory problems’. But Ruth wasn’t so lucky, as the tour caters for people with asthma and has various procedures which ensure everyone can have a go. Lucky Ruth.

So here she is, the first Cuboid to try out the new underwater walking tour, coming face to fin with venomous lionfish, sharks and spotted eagle rays. And look, she’s loving it, and so did the agents who are now raving about the experience to their customers!

SeaWorld Parks & Entertainment  identified the need to respond to local market conditions and capitalise on opportunities to increase pre-sold attraction tickets to UK travellers embarking on their Florida holiday.

Pleasure Insight

Around 1m UK holiday-goers annually make the pilgrimage to Florida, the theme park capital of the world. Florida doesn’t come cheap for two weeks of unadulterated fun and this is underpinned with almost military precision style planning to squeeze as much as possible from budgets. Consumers not only feel that planning is essential, but also an enjoyable activity for all the family to build interest and anticipation of an unforgettable holiday experience.

Creative Execution

With a fully integrated team for SeaWorld in house, our advice has considerable influence in defining UK objectives and strategy, often working twelve months ahead. Responsible for brand and campaign management – above, below and through the line – our remit includes traditional media, digital, retail and b2b marketing.  A key aspect is tackling local needs by working with key third party influencers like tour operators and ticket wholesalers. Effectively we operate a micro sales & marketing team that mirrors the client’s US functions.

Campaign Results

We can be judged in many ways, namely making budgets work harder, identifying changes in this source market and reacting accordingly, and standing tall against competitor parks. The one fixed measure is ensuring the highest penetration of visitors to our Florida parks from the UK.  We think that working with SeaWorld for 16 years best highlights the value that we offer.

To ensure SeaWorld Parks are on UK travellers’  itineraries within the hotly competitive Florida theme park market.

Pleasure Insight

Holidays that cost over £5,000 simply can’t go wrong – no one wants to hear they missed out on something amazing.  Influence is the key, with first-time visitors buying into recommendations from like-minded peers who have been to Orlando, and those who have been before enjoying sharing their ‘expertise’ by helping first-timers plan their break.

Creative Execution

The ‘SeaWorld Experience Planner’ brings all four Florida parks to life with reviews, ratings, photos and videos added by previous visitors. As users add attractions to their personal holiday plan, the tool intuitively advises which ticket they need to purchase to fulfil their ‘on holiday’ experience. Users can save, tweak and create multiple plans. Once satisfied, plans can be shared through email, Facebook or Twitter to either announce intentions to like-minded friends and family or seek assurance that nothing has been left off!

Campaign Results

A quarter of all visitors to seaworldparks.co.uk use the Experience Planner and dwell time has almost doubled since its launch. The full circle visibility of  fans, from the attractions of interest to the volume of uploads, now enables us to tailor new messages and content to ‘coaster nuts’ or ‘animal lovers’. Fan power is critical in amplifying our message to likeminded communities.

To uncover this truth we need to take a moment to unpick the grocery shopping process.  We can have all of our favourites listed for ease of use on the online engine, then set the delivery time that fits into our day and also find goods we are looking for (providing we know what they are of course), and then press the pay or buy now button.  But herein lies the insight…  We now wait.  In waiting, we alter our shopping conditions from being active to becoming passive, we wait.  Unlike any other shopping experience, in this instance there is no emotive reward, only a rational reward of a task completed.

Online grocery makes sense, and will always have a role, but the fact is despite being told not to shop when we are hungry, we still do it as we salivate and want it now.  Until online grocery shopping can approach 30-45mins from ‘click to delivery’, as seen with your average pizza delivery time, it won’t thrive or exponentially grow.  Digital pizza ordering is an active process as we can get it now, whereas online grocery ordering is a passive process.

If shopper marketing is the identification and capitalisation on the elements of the shopping process, then starting with the conditions of the shopper’s need state is pretty mission critical.  Shopper data is readily available, real insight is seeing the human truth.

Once we get past the expected frustration regarding our pure dislike for the way things look or the fact we can’t find that button we once overused, we’ll start to get closer to the core of what will run through the minds of Facebookers and we’ll realise very quickly that any sort of exodus from the network is going to require a much greater change than simply the way Facebook presents your data.

‘I’ll close my account’ is what you will say.  Seeing your past posts, status and photo uploads resurface in an unexpected way is going to come as a little bit of a surprise.  That angry post you made about your boss that you’d forgotten about or those pictures from that night out you’d rather block from your mind, all thrown back at you in a sensibly formatted way won’t feel overly sensible at first… it’s more likely to upset you.  You’ll no doubt get riled up about the lacklustre respect Facebook has for your personal information.  This would be unjustified.  Facebook has ever-increasing pressure with regard to privacy matters.  Visualising your information in a different manner doesn’t magnify those.  If you’ve got some issues with that resurfacing data, you’d best discover that ‘Delete Post’ button swiftly.

‘I won’t close my account’ will be what you really think.  Our lives are so heavily dependant on us being online that very few of us now can maintain the social circles we like to keep offline.  It’s not that we’ve become socially inept; it’s more that we’ve become so reliant on the network that we’d be lost without it.  All of that aside, you’ve got to admit that the information that appears on your Timeline isn’t new.  It’s been there since the start.  It’s been there since YOU added it.  And while the Timeline might present people with an easy way to peruse your life, it’s really up to you to decide what they see.

I think consumers will struggle with the changes at first, but like most changes on Facebook, we’ll forget about them in order to engage with the platform in the same way we always have.

In their relentless quest to stay ahead of the competition and deliver increasingly complex ways for brands to engage with consumers, Facebook has implemented a steady wave of updates since it launched.  Few of those have meant quite as much to the advertising and brand community as this next set.  Suddenly there are all sorts of modules that would make for relevant ad integration… It’s a shift in direction for both end users, advertisers and for Facebook as a company.  Users automatically publish their interaction with brands, articles, music, applications and each other in a seamless, straightforward feed all linking back to Timeline and their direct network.  All of this takes Facebook’s engagement levels to new heights and asks brands to embrace the platform in ways they’d previously questioned.

From a pure data visualisation/integration point of view, the changes are impressive.  Which would explain why Facebook already has 1.1 million “developers” using Timeline, roughly 100,000 to 200,000 users have been upgrading their account each day in anticipation of a public launch.

Timeline has clearly been given some solid thought.  There are many things Zuckerberg does that I don’t always agree with, including the way he cuts his hair… but this time, I’m on his side.  Let’s embrace Timeline, not slander it.  You say you’ll delete your account.  I know you won’t.

As Gary Barlow takes Simon Cowell’s seat on season 8 of the hit show, I noticed that Diageo has cleverly tapped into the ‘X-Fever’ by announcing Madonna & Smirnoff’s hunt the best nightlife in the world, and ultimately the world’s best unknown dancer. Clever.

So, it made me think.  As jobs go, who gets the best judge gig? Let’s put money aside – hardly an issue for these two!

After week one, Gary seems to have got the measure of the shoes he’s filling.  He’s playing the honest judge, saying it like it is and playing ‘Mr. Not-So-Nice’ when needed. Madge, on the other hand, is taking the laid back approach by getting hopefuls to submit a 60-second dance video to Smirnoff or to her own Facebook page. One to Madonna.

Although Madonna’s been around for longer, getting on the X-Factor panel for Barlow has catapulted the 40-year old singer into the media spotlight.  With his squeaky clean reputation he should also get a point for ensuring this post is not all about showbiz celebrity gossip. When I put Madonna into Google, all you get is story after story of how she is dating men up to 20 years her junior. One all.

While Gary has to be camera-ready every Saturday, and handle rehearsals, interviews and promotion, Madonna only has to attend one of the selected Smirnoff Nightlife Exchange Project experiences, where finalists picked from the video contest will compete in front of her for the winning spot. The eventual winner may, yes only ‘may’, get the opportunity to join the pop singer on her next tour as one of her dancers. Score: 2-1 to Madonna.

With fears that many fans would desert Gary and the new panel following the departure of star judge Simon Cowell, the primetime show seems unaffected, reaching almost as many viewers as the opening night last year. Around half a million people watched the talent show on ITV1+1 – a feature not available last year – bringing the total average audience to 11.02m, making it the second highest in the programme’s history.

While Gary pulls in 11m every weekend, Smirnoff’s campaign has bid to get 10 million people to share the most original experiences across 50 countries. Revellers worldwide are also invited to co-create and participate in the Smirnoff Nightlife Exchange Project by contributing ideas on what makes their local nightlife distinct in the categories of drinks, dance, fashion, music and places. Tough one. With 50 countries, from Great Britain to Ghana – it’s 3-1 to Madonna.

Now I love to watch so-called talented Brits on X-Factor, and I have bought Olly Murs album, so I’m definitely sucked in by the X-Factor franchise.  But not only does the dancer selected by Madonna get to dance on tour with her (maybe), but just by taking part online, entrants have the chance to be at one of the global Smirnoff events, either at home or abroad.

Sorry Gary, I have fancied you all these years and still do – but Madonna clearly gets the better gig.